Miles of Courage

There was a time in my 20s when convenience was more appealing to me than quality, when comfort superceded depth.

But convenience almost always costs more in the long run; sometimes we find out after the fact that the total price we end up paying is one we were never willing to pay to begin with.

And comfort seldom keeps you from drifting when the winds of life come bellowing; deep roots and survival skills born in times of adversity do.

In my 20s, I went on like this. Convenience and comfort, comfort and convenience. For years. Eventually, I found myself completely exhausted emotionally and relationally. Everything around and within me felt fragile, superficial, and unsteady. I needed support more than ever to anchor me and yet the life I was living felt like a shell of sorts any which way I turned. I grew up in the church and felt connected with God and believed in salvation through faith in Jesus, and I was in counseling.

So why did things still feel so unlevel?

Without realizing it, I had unknowingly been avoiding any and all things that carried a potential risk of discomfort or pain, even if the discomfort was only temporary or theoretical in nature.

The result was a life that seemed predictable in some ways at first glance, but was actually highly unstable underneath the surface, particularly with respects to my relationships.

Today, more than a decade later, I have since discerned 2 very important life lessons:

1. One of the most important things I can do in life is to live the life that I have been given with courage.
2. In order to experience the fullest life God has for me, I have to choose to do #1 over and over. Every hour, every day. Even when it is hard, messy, or feels uncertain. I can aspire and work towards the best version of my life, yes. But it truly needs to be the best version of my life and not some other life I (or others) have fabricated for me.

The choice to live courageously challenges me to commit to personal and spiritual growth over convenience and comfort. It is not centered on knowing the specific outcome or the end of some of the hurdles I will face in my lifetime perse. Rather it’s rooted in a trust in the Author of the story, God. I can be strong and courageous in my own life because I trust that He will be with me come what may, as He was with the Israelites as they prepared to enter the land God promised them that was completely inhabited by intimidating giants (see soul script 1). I can choose to trust His heart for me, His goodness, and His sovereignty over every aspect of my story. In the short term, choosing courage and continuing to choose courage challenges me to weather and not run from life’s difficulties; in the long term, I experience more of His Presence, I grow, and I develop deep roots of resilience, the steadfastness James describes in the Bible in the book of James (see soul script 2).

One cool truth I am finding is that faith-filled courage, while exhausting, actually begets more faith and more courage! So being brave gets more familiar, a bit less scary, and (dare I even say) easier emotionally in some ways.

Postpartum with 2 living children ages 2 and under, with my husband and I both in new jobs, I find I am having to choose courage multiple times a day. It’s got me reflecting on this subject matter.

Women of Courage

If you enjoyed this post on courage, do stick around. In a series of posts this summer, I will be exploring elements of courageous living in a series I am fondly calling “Woman of Courage”. I will be sharing excerpts of my own journey towards living courageously in my marriage, my vocation (medicine), and motherhood. These posts will also include reflections on stories of courageous women in the Bible that have encouraged me on this path and interviews of incredible women from my own personal community who are living and choosing courage daily.

We are surrounded by insurmountable quantities of discouragement these days, yall. Just turn on the news or social media. My hope and prayer about this series is that you would be encouraged where you need it most; that you realize that you are part of an entire community of Sons and Daughters selem Elohim (made in the image of the Almighty God) who are all hobbling along trying to be courageous in hard spaces. I hope that these words would inspire you to continue to ask the hard question “how can I choose faith-filled courage in God’s plan for my own life here? Now?” May the answer propel you closer to living the full life that He has always intended for you.

Soul Scripts:

1. “…Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9, ESV, the Bible)
2. “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.” (James 1: 2-3, ESV, the Bible)

With love,

Ifeoma